Adventures of Jen and Coco

Monday, March 15, 2010

Word Of The Month-Forgive

I was planning to use another word for this month, but after a few events, I decided that forgiveness made the most sense. I found out some unfortunate news, and at the time, I was devastated by it. After wallowing for a little bit and then being angry, I decided it was time to grow up and get over it. I learned some surprising news about two people that I've cared about very much. At first I kept asking myself, why, why me, how could they do this to me? It was all about me, me, me...but then I realized, this is my problem. It shouldn't always be about me. I learned so many things from this experience. I've learned about love, trust, loyalty, and most of all, forgiveness. I've always thought of myself as being quick to forgive, so this situation was certainly a big test for me. Before I go on I should give the definition...

Forgiveness:
~typically defined as the process of concluding resentment, indignation or anger as a result of a perceived offense, difference or mistake, and/or ceasing to demand punishment or restitution

The awesome book that's helped me (besides the Bible of course!)

The part of this definition that sticks out to me the most..."ceasing to demand punishment or restitution". That was a hard pill for me to swallow. I can say I forgive, I can stop being angry, but until I stop seeking restitution, its not complete. This is what I've been working on. I'm no longer angry, sad, or wish ill against either party. In fact, I seriously hope to even mend one of the relationships, but I realize that this person has to want that too (don't worry people, it's not him). I realize that life is bigger than petty things like this. I realize that the person that I was seeing, was completely wrong for me. And while this was possibly the most painful way for me to quit, it was possibly the only thing that would work. So in a way, I'm somewhat grateful. I've learned so much from this experience, and I continue to everyday. I wish the best for all parties involved.

Forgiveness isn't saying what the other person did was "ok". It's letting the action go and moving on without wishing ill towards anyone involved. It's not just for the other person, its for you as well. And as a Christian, I believe that if I can't forgive, then why should Christ forgive me?

I still have a lot to learn, even after an eventful 27 years. This event was possibly one of the biggest yet for me, and in many ways, I'm grateful for it. I pray that one day everything will be resolved, and again, the best happens for everyone.

I am so fortunate to have friends and family that care so much, and a Savior that loves me more than all of them combined.

"Judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven:" Luke 6:37, KJV

Life is beautiful. xo

My eventful weekend...

I'm big into planning. I like knowing what I'm going to do before I get ready to do it. So when emergencies come along, I am not happy about it. This happened to me this weekend. Friday night I received an upsetting phone call, and that seems to be what triggered everything. I was sick all night (I'll spare the gory details) and it got a LOT worse the next morning. Finally I called the doctor's office, told them my symptoms, and they told me to go straight to the Emergency Room. So I called the ER first to make sure I should, and they said to hurry and get there.

I called mom and let her know I was headed to Memorial Regional, and went on my way. I have to say, these people know what they're doing. I imagined myself in a waiting room with a bunch of sick and injured people for hours...nope! It was not even five minutes, and I was getting weighed, having my temp and bp taken, and then set up into a room. Not even five minutes after that, I had an IV started because I was so dehydrated, and they put a little stomach medicine in the IV, and then some Morphine. That was quite a shock to my system, I'd never had anything like that. Felt like something weighing me down, but that went away quickly, and so did the pain, which I was grateful for. Shortly after mom and Samantha showed up, so that was nice :) I had a few tests run, including a CT scan, which was also a new experience for me, and then I got sent home, with pretty much no information-but a few prescriptions, including Vicodin-which knocks me OUT! Hey, it could be worse!!! They deduced it to extreme stress, and told me to follow up with a specialist. So for now, I am waiting to see what the specialist says on Wednesday...wish me luck!

Thank you for all of my awesome friends and family that have been checking up on me with this, I love you guys! xo

My lil wristband (had to mark out the SSN! Can't believe they put that on there!)

Gross!!! Lots of blood taken and then IV fluids and drugs

CT Scanner-

Then I got in one of these..pretty strange, very "Grey's Anatomy" hehe

Praying for good results from the specialist Wednesday afternoon...we'll see!

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

I love my friends =)

I may just be the luckiest girl in the world! After an unfortunate series of events earlier this month, I was really low. So...Jen's girlfriends to the rescue!!!! While I worked hard to get through the ending of a disaster(to say the least) of a relationship, my girlfriends were there to help me every step of the way. I have to give extra credit to Elisabeth for bearing a lot of this burden. She was there from the beginning, bearing gifts of tissues, oreos, milk, ice cream, buffalo bites, and artichoke bites...the girl knows me well. :) After a full day of pity party...

I woke up Monday with a different attitude, ready to move on.

I don't know how it happened so quickly, but I sure am glad it did.

The rest of the week was almost a blur, I was busy every night! Monday night was Casa Grande with Crystal, Tuesday and Wednesday I worked at Yankee, Thursday I had girl's night in with Elisabeth, and Friday I had dinner with Hollie at O'Charleys. Over the weekend I even kept busy working at the bank to get ready for conversion. Not only were my days and nights full, but I had constant check ups from Mom, my Dad, my bro, E, Mel, Crystal, Hollie, Kathy, Brooke, Honor, Ashley, coworkers, and many others. Without these people, I don't think I could've moved past this so quickly. When horrible things happen, you do find out who your friends are. And I can say the thing that all of these people had in common-they all disliked the choice that I made to date this person-but not one of them said "I told you so"-and I'm SURE that would've been easy to say. They stuck by me like REAL friends do, and that means the WORLD to me. I love my friends.

This situation has taught me so much. I've learned more about myself, my friends, trust, God's will, and forgiveness. I've never been through something like this, but I hear that some people take a LONG time to get through it. I've always considered myself blessed, very blessed. But now I know this for sure. I learned that I was in a downward spiraling situation, and had this exact situation not happened, I may have never got out. My friends were right. My friends are smart. So ladies, while you will never say it to me, I'll say it for you. You told me so, you were right, and I wish I would've realized it a LONG time ago. To the people who've been there for me throughout this, I love you, and truly appreciate what you've done for me, in the past, and now. I pray that I can always be there for you too.

I can't finish this post without one last acknowledgment. I could never have recovered so quickly without God's help. While my friends were instrumental, God was #1, always there. Between the Bible, prayer, and a great book on forgiveness, I could very well be a wreck right now, but I'm not. I am truly blessed, with a good Savior, friends, family, health, and the hope for an awesome future. And another thing I've learned in all of this...I've made a lot of poor choices in regards to a mate, and I need to stop trying to do it on my own. I need to be PATIENT, and better myself, and wait for the one God wants me to be with. I'm taking time to enjoy life, better myself, and pamper myself instead of someone else that doesn't deserve it. Like my girls say, I can't love someone else the right way until I love me!

Everything happens for a reason. This is SO true. And at that moment when it happened, I was devastated. But honestly, it's possibly the best thing that's happened to me. It's just what I needed. A good kick in the butt.

Now, time to move on to bigger and better things! :)

Life is beautiful. xo

Friend of the Month: Melody Grey Hammon=my BFF

It's only fitting that my Friend of the Month for March be Mel-it's her birfdayyy month! I met Mel several years ago, and throughout the years we've grown super close! :)

My Melody is beautiful, super smart, fabulous, and we have lots of the same interests (aka eating, sleeping, and shopping). She's the first person I call when I'm excited about something, happy, sad, had a bad day, stressed, bored, or lonely. She's always there, and I love it. Mel lives in Charlotte, and while I love going to visit her down there, I miss her a lot! It's hard to have a best friend so far away! I LOVE that we can see each other now via Skype, and I get to see my awesome nephew Meir (and her dog Coach) too!!! We try to see each other once a month, taking turns coming to visit each other. This month it's my turn to come see her for her birthday! I feel like she just "gets" me. I think that's hard to find in another person, someone who totally gets you, and still loves you anyway haha :) I can also look to her for an honest opinion, whether I like the answer or not. She's just wonderful!!! I love that we can go out and have a good time, or we can just stay in and be lazy and have just as much fun. I mean seriously, who else do you know that could make a trip to the Verizon store fun?!? I love my Melody, I love our inside jokes and her big heart. My BFF!!!

Sometimes, a girl’s just gotta treat herself

So life has been a little stressful lately. Between personal drama, and working lots of overtime to prepare for the merger at UBSH, I’ve been super stressed and exhausted. After a crazy day at work Monday, I found myself alone for the first time in over a week, and I realized that I needed a treat, and I couldn’t stand to be in that apartment for one more second. My girlfriends always tell me that I won't find real love until I love myself first...So what did I do? I headed out to get a mani/pedi of course! When I pulled up, they were closing, but they recognized me, and they were nice enough to stay open…just for me! They gave me a manicure and pedicure at the same time, did a bunch of extra stuff like hot stone massage, and then handed me a bunch of coupons-nice! Needless to say they were compensated, they deserved it!

After the mani/pedi I ran to the ABC store to pick up a bottle of the wine that I had at the sushi place with Hollie, Takara Plum-a Japanese sweet wine. Well, apparently ABC stores only sell VA wines-booo…so I asked for suggestions. I can only do dessert wines, because I am a big baby. This is when I was introduced to Cooper Vineyard’s Noche. Oh. My. GOD! That stuff is delicious!!!!! When leaving the store I had no clue if I would like it or not, so I picked up some of Horton’s Pear Port too, just in case. I filled up the bathtub with a ton of bubbles, lit every candle in the apartment, grabbed my trashiest chick lit, my glass of Noche, and a bunch of Ghirardelli chocolate squares with raspberry filling. I think for about 45 minutes, I may have been in Heaven. Any other time, I would’ve felt horrible about wasting money on a manicure and pedicure and 2 bottles of wine for just me, but hey, girl’s gotta treat herself, especially when things want to fall apart. But you know what they say-sometimes things fall apart so better things can come together…

Nothin' like one of these...